Tinder Tuesday is back this week and the estrogen is flowing!  This is the second female I’ve featured and I’m loving it.  After all, I’m an equal opportunity mocker.

Let’s get to it, shall we?  This week’s candidate doesn’t show her face so I don’t even have to worry about trying to black it out.  Apparently she thinks looks don’t matter…which probably means she’s ugly.  Here she is showing off her biggest assets.  Emphasis on “ass”…and tits.

Tinder Tuesday photo for 8-5

I’m not much of a fashionista but something tells me this outfit isn’t “Casual Friday” appropriate.  Come to think of it, I can’t imagine anywhere it’s appropriate, except, of course, posing for a selfie in one’s bedroom.

I can’t tell if it was a full body suit that a rabid cat shredded, or if she took a pair of scissors to it herself.  Part of it looks like it could be a swimming suit, although I suspect the pants aren’t aerodynamic.

Is she wearing underwear with this?  I suspect not, although if her underwear is as tattered as her outfit, she may be hiding those somewhere.

And is that a tapered leg pant?  Doesn’t she know those are soooo last season?

I’m no sure why she couldn’t just take a selfie without using a mirror, but perhaps she doesn’t have a smart phone.  Something tells me this chic isn’t the brightest bulb, which is funny, because her camera didn’t even use a flash, so that bulb isn’t very bright either.

Speaking of that mirror, it confuses me because it doesn’t look like there’s a bottom to it.  It’s like the damn Chronicles of Narnia up in there.

Looking up to her pits I see a problem.  A lot of problems.  It looks like this woman spent all of her time shimmying into this pink number and neglected to shave her pits….ever.

I love that her “about” section doesn’t say anything about her.  Instead, it says she’s “new the site just checking it out.”  Apparently this pink goddess isn’t a fan of capitalization, or grammar.

Fortunately, we can deduce from the background that she loves quilts made out of old t-shirts.  Something tells me those shirts are from one-night-stands; from the guys who never called her again.  I can imagine her pillaging through the men’s dirty laundry while they’re asleep, all the while trying to find a memento of their night together.  That is….other than the $20 they slipped her for “services rendered.”

And let’s look at those shoes.  They’re…interesing.  I can’t tell if that’s a hair scrunchie at the top of her heels or if that’s part of the shoe.

Either way, nothing says classy like fringe coupled with a shredded unitard.

Week 6 of Tinder Tuesdays