Tinder Tuesdays: 4th Edition

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Week 4 of Tinder Tuesdays

Can you believe it’s Tuesday again?  Fortunately, that means it’s time for another edition of  Tinder Tuesdays, where I take an actual photo from Tinder and mock it mercilessly.

This week is an…interesting photo.  I’m not sure how else to describe it, so I’ll just get to it.

Tinder Tuesday guy with snakeskin

What.  The.  Frick?

Let’s start by what is wrapped around his neck.  I want to say it’s a snake but I don’t think this guy is manly enough to have a snake that large.  If he does have a snake, it’s one he found in his herb garden.  He is currently housing the snake in a fish tank, feeding it fresh vegetables and garnishes.

He named the snake Roger.

So what is it exactly?  Something to sit on? Maybe he has hemorrhoids and needs to carry around an inflatable pillow, but he thinks this looks more manly.

It doesn’t.

Week 4 of Tinder TuesdaysAnd how about that two pack of abs?  What I love best about it is the fact that he’s sucking in…as if the focus of this photo is on his stomach.

Moving right along, let’s focus on that sweet prison tattoo on his bicep.  What exactly is that?  A carcass of an animal?  A steer?

Since I’m a fan of college football, I’m telling myself it’s the mascot of University of Texas.  Hook em horns.

Looking to the left of the photo it looks like he has a band-aid on his right bicep.  I’m not sure what caused his boo boo but I really hope it wasn’t a run-in with Roger.

Either way, I would have pegged him for a Pokemon band-aid kind of guy.  I’m a little disappointed.

I’m not sure where he’s posing for this photo but it looks like it’s right outside his grandma’s worn down trellis…the grandma who has been dead for 7 years.

I like to tell myself that belt buckle has her initials in her honor.

What do you see in this week’s Tinder Tuesday’s bachelor?  Discuss.


Where else am I on the web this week?

If humans were more like dogs

A guide to packing for a weekend in Las Vegas

What your wedding vows really mean

Top 10 Excuses To Get Out Of Exercising

A helpful guide for North West for living with a horrible name

Keeping the “happy” in “Happy Birthday”

29 thoughts on “Tinder Tuesdays: 4th Edition

  1. It sure seems like these men try too darn hard with the props and whatnot. beeeeeeeee yourself! But then what would we have so much fun with? Lisa , size down the arrows if you can. This is way too much fun!

    1. I’m so glad you enjoyed it! I will see about sizing down the arrows next time. Doing the arrows and annotations are the hardest part about these posts!

      Thanks for reading and commenting.

  2. Hi, I’m a friend of Ashley’s and she asked that I share a tidbit of my online searches over the weekend. Within a 15 minute time span, I viewed a profile of a man in S&M garb and an erect penis. Two separate profiles. Cheers!

    1. I think you’re right about last week’s picture. It was perfection and will be hard to top. I’m game to keep trying though. It’s so fun looking at these pictures and making fun of them!

  3. What I find interesting is that, in my Pride (pause for Lisa to laugh), this specmen would be considered a “daddy” and therefore “hot”. Though I too find older, muscular men attractive (pause for the rest of you to get the Pride joke), this may not be one. Though, after further review, there are several pros. The hemorrhoid pillow can be repurposed as an…extra apparatus during those tender daddy moments. Who doesn’t love being hoisted up like an ’89 Buick and played with? The tattoo, to me says, “I have money. Not a lot and I’ll need you to pay for dinner, but I have $10.00 I found on the street. I can buy us ice cream…or the free lube packets.” The belt buckle takes the prize. It’s so multi functional. It’ll help remind his current conquest of his name (not that it matters but it’s nice to know for posterity). It can be used as a punishment device. I don’t know about you, but I love getting hit in the face with a large, gold plated metal device. I mean, who doesn’t?

    So crack open an ice cold natty light oh daddy of the Pride. We know you’ll give us the back of your hand and while saying we have a pretty mouth. Mr. Prison Tattoo, Daddy Guuuuuuuyyyyy.

    1. Be careful what you ask for Sarah! There’s so many of these Tinder pictures that you can’t unsee.

      I’m glad you enjoyed this one. I have so much fun writing them so it’s nice to know they make people laugh!

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